Newspaper Archive of
Arkansas Catholic
Little Rock, Arkansas
November 4, 1911     Arkansas Catholic
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November 4, 1911

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, r THE SOUTHERN GUARDIAN F, k.= .............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................. 2 .................. L ..................... _ ........................................................................ i A PLEA FOR MOTHER GOOSE. [From the Little Rook News] In nay own estimation 1 am a pa- tient and long-sutlering wonlan, but there are some things I will not bear. Ruthless iconoclasts have striven to demolish my idols and belittle my ideals and I have kept silent--I have been gravely informed that it is wicked to perpetuate the loving myth of Santa Claus; have been told that my heroes were very ordinary mor- tals; that "Villiam Tell was as shadowy a ng as one of ttomer's mythological ,de. I have no reply when superc usly informed that Shakespeare, x  has left no great thought unwritten, nb chord of hu- man emotion untouched, was bnt Bacon after all. I have heard it said that Byron was not much of a poet and that Dickens was a very sloven- ly novelist, a good caracaturist, that was all, but I continned to read and enjoy these writers and made no sign. But now forhearance has ceased to be a virtue. ] ahnost feel as if per- sonally assailed and will keep silent no longer, Some iconoclasts, calling them- selves a woman's club, have entered into a crusade against that venerable and venerated individual, Mother Goose herself. They protest against children being taught such nonsense, being fed ripen such "ridiculous men tal pabulum." For me Mother Goose forms a part of every merry, healthy, rollicking child's existence, and 1 can no more separate the two than I can dissever a club woman from a cyclopedia. I pity the child who never rode to Banbury Cross or listened to the tragic story of Jack and Jill or beard the pitiful question, "Who killed Cock Robin?" A child who never heard of "The House That Jack Built" or of the "Old Woman Who Went to the Market to Buy Her a Kid." Will that club which has en- tered its protest against Mother Goose give us anything better, any- thing which will more quickly arouse the interest of the child, which will sooner bring the musical hmgh or more gently totteh the chords of sym- pathy? If that society has a member who drops into poetry occasionally, like Silas Negg, or like Orpheus C. Kerr runs to it as naturally as a water- melon does to seed, let bar try a few original stanzas upon a bright child, and she will find they will fall more flatly than Humpty Dumpty ever ever did. "Abolish Mothe Goose and adopt something more sensiblel" That club never read between the lines. Abolish Mother Goose! You might as well attempt to abolish but- tercups and dandelions because they are not roses and magnolias. If, after this harangue, this wise club should fail to withdraw its pro- test or adjourn sine die and sink into 'inoccuous desuetude," then I respect- fully advise t to adopt for a study the ordinar) British novel, which Brander Matthews tells ns is a sprawling invertebrate, not to call it an inorganic conglomerate." That should satisfy them. ANTI-ICONOCLAST. Georgetown Visitation Convent A Boarding and Day School for Youeg Ladies and Little Girls Deliwhtfully Situated on Georlretowa Heishta WASHINGTON, D. C. Founded in 1799. Address Sister Diretore MIVELAZ'S CAFE P. L. MIVELAZ, Manager. Phone 2732. Successor to GLEASON'S HOTEL CARE. sx4 West Second Street. ALL DELICACIES IN SEASON. OYSTERS IN SEASON. THERE WAS PLENTY LEFT OVER. One Sunday morning a certain young pastor in his first charge an- nounced nervously: "I will take for my text the words 'And they fed five men with five thou- sand loaves of bread and two thou- sand fishes.'" At this misquotation an old par- ishiouer from his seat in the anaen corner said audibly: .. "That's no miracle--I d do it nlyself." The young preacher sai/ nothing at the time, but the next S,nday he announced the same text again. This time he got it right. "And they fet five thousand men on five loaves of bread and two fishes." He waited a moment, and then, leaning over the pulpit and looldng at tlte amen corner, said: "And could you do that, too, /vlr. Smith?" "Of course I could," Mr. Smith re- plied. "And how could you do it?" said the preacher. "With what was left over from last Sunday," said Mr. Smith. THE BIBLE SAYS SO. Small GirlWhy doesn't baby talk, father ? Father--l{e can't talk yet, dear; young babies never do. Small Girl--Oh, yes, they do. Job did. Nurse read to me out of the Bible how Job cursed the day he was born. It was in the primary class of a graded school in a Western city, and the day was the 22d of February. "Now, who can tell me whose birth- day this day is?" asked the teacher. A little gM arose timidly. "Well, Margaret, you may tell us," said the teacher. "Mine," was the unexpected reply "Dear Clara," wrote the young man, "pardon me, but I'm getting so for- getful. I proposed to you last night, but really forgot whether you said yes or no." "Dear Will," she replied by note, "so glad to hear from you. I know I said 'no' to someone last night, but I had forgotten who it was." Mrs. Brown--(from the front porch) Buster! Busterl 01, Busterl Little Buster (from around the cor- ner, on third call)Yessutn. Mrs. BrownWhy didn't you an- swer me when I called you? Little Buster Cause I never heard you the first two times :,:,)u called. Manhattan The anthorities of my city are talking of having a detail of airship police. LaSalleIMyI They certainly are behind the times. My cityhas had fly cops for the last decade. ONE ON HIM. "I never judge a woman hy her clothes," observed a "smart" young man to a lady friend. "No," put in the young lady; "a man who gets to as many burlesque shows as you do wouldn't." I PRETTY POST CARDS 1 g. V All Kinds-Big Assortmen t Illmb Sixteen cards, I5C; thri- ty-five for 25c, postpaid.W.H. DOT- TON, 70z West Markham, Little Rock, Arkansas. i S--9--EE Mrs. KIME FOR MILLINERY Hidhhnd Car Seventh & Vict0 J. J. Healey C.A. Roth Only Chapel and Private Reception Rooms in the City Healey & Roth FUNERAL DIRECTORS Private Grey Ambulance, Day or Night , Lady Assistant 710 Main tt. Little Eck, Ark., Southern Guardian Ads Bring Results INVESTIGATE IIIIIIIIIIIIiIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIV Fall Millinery in Beautiful and i Exclusive Desl00ns = LENSING'S i - 701 Main Street m -= Phone 2658 i '' ....... "?" ................. "" .......... "r" .......... I When the Thompsons came in from their brisk Sunday afternoon walk, cheerful and happy, Mrs. Thompson deposited her wonderful millinery cre- ation on the table in the reception hall. Then she hastened into the kitchen to prepare one of her delight- ful Sunday evening supImrs, which Thompson says are entirely without equals In the culinary line. Thompson removed his hat and coat mad then wandered into the kitchen after his wife. He has a way of "tag- ging" her about the house. This Is due partly to the fact that he is an ab- stractly social creature and partly to the strange circumstance that he has a particular predilection for his wife's society. Presently he drifted into the pantry and returned with a small yel- low skinned onion in his hand. "What do you call this beautiful ob- Ject?" he inquired facetiously. His wife con,idered this attempt at witticism quite unworthy of notice. She merely instructed him to put the Galen back where it belonged or he wottld be smelling like an onion patch. After dipping around into varioui thRs which he should have left alone, Thompson left the ldtohen, sttll hold- ing the onion in kls hand. On hls way to the living room he pased through the hall and there, spying the Sumlay hat of Mrs. Thompson, he was moved to separates the feathers and other bl- Jouterle which adorned it and to drop the recently acquired redolent root into the nest thus arranged, After this frisky deed he went into the living room and soon forgot hiI lit- tle Jok Owing to a series of donestic cata- clysms Mrs. Thompson dressed for the tea given by Mrs. LawtonIhre. IAtwton was quite the most aristocrat- to person among Mrs. Thompson's ac. qualntances, o she was particularly anxious to make a good appearance, though she hated teas--in a good deal of a hurry. She entered the street car which would take her nearest her datlnatlon very much out of breath and with one glove still only partly on, She was too much occupied with her glove for a few momenta to be con- soious of extraneous things, but pres- ently her thoughts bacame less con- centrated and she began to peroele a faint odor of onions in the air. She looked suspiciously at the woman who sat next to her and the woman who sat next to her looked suspiciously at her. Before long the other woman, snif. tint the air with obvious intent, ruse and took a seat as far away from ,Mrs. Thompson as possible. "Well," murmured Mrs. Thomlm0n, indignantly to herself, '*if people will soak themselv tn onions they have. to expect to he annoyed by the odor." Iowever, she was somewhat sur- prised to realize in a few moment that, In spite of the departure of the woman the scent of onions still hung in the atmosphere. With a slight ex- clam: '.'.on of annoyance she glano sidewise at the woman on the other side of her and after a minute or so followed the example of the first wom- an. For a short time she seemed to haw escaped the penetrating odor, but whel the little breeze caused hy her hasty movement had died down, the onion odor once more demanded her attention. It became so insistent that she breathed a sigh of relief when she reached her corner and left the car. She was having a fairly good time at the tea when the acquainUmoe with whom she had been talking suddenly put up a gloved hand and murmured behind it: "Truly, It is a horrible sue* ptclon, but I am becoming more and more convinced every minute that our hostess is going to serve onions au "turale on this festive occasion." R was at this point that Mrs. Thomp. )n began to feel distinctly yncomfort- able. Just how she could shed an oalon flavor everywhere she went she was totally unahle to imagine, but if the odor had no connection with her, why did it follow her about so per- sistently 7' She was still turning this question over uneasily in her mind, when Mrs. Perkins, who lived two blocks from her, approached her and invited her to drive home with her In her electric runabout. When they had gone only a little distance Mrs. Perkins gave a sudden exclamation of disgust. "Do you smell onions?" she asked. "Mrs. Thompson sniffed faint heart- edly. "II believe I do," she mur- mured, meekly. "I do helleve," concluded Mrs. Pe kins, vehemently, "that our chauffeur ha bean sleeping in the carl" She was in the depths of depression when Thompson reached home. With- oat delay she poured her tale of woe into his oar. A she proceeded, his lno [sial expression of indiscriminate sym- party became tinctured with under- standing. Then the bright light of comprehension spread over his face, the corners of his mouth quivered with mirth and at the climax he gave vent to a shout of laughter. "Oh, my da." he said when he was able to speak, "you eertalnly will kill me when 2[ tell you." So he did tell her, but he was no longer laughing when he reached the end of his tale. In truth, he was obliged to address the latter part to her indignant back as she flew angrily up the stairs. The price of peace was a new hat, bigger and more wonderful than the one with the onion flavor. Snookums in She was the littlest girl--the one on the end of the line to whom Denby "worked" in the kid song that was the excuse for the children's chorus. She was a mite with big blue eyes that saw more than was altogether good for a child of six, yet saw with unseeing eyes the undercurrent of evil that marred life "behind." "Snookums," Denby had called her the opening night when her short legs refused to carry her off the stage with the others in the mad rush that ws the wind-up of the song, and after that her real name of Polly Crane appeared only on the salarY, roll. The "Snook- urns" hit was a success. Snookums worshiped Denby, who in his careless, good-natured way made a pet of the small child that contrib- uted so materially to his own hit. The little girl came to love those moments when she sat on his lap with the spot light full on them and he sang to her the nursery rhymes that were so much funnier than the ones her moth- er sang, with so many lines that Snookums did not understand. Miss Carver used to stand behind them on the stage with her arm about Denby's neck; for Miss Carver was the big- gest of the little girls, though she was Denby's wife. Snookums was fond of Miss Carver, too; and as the song went on she used to reach up and press against her cheek the hand that rested lightly on Denby's shoulder. There came a night when talk that had been growing increasingly frank in the company came to Edith Car- ver's ears. It was prefaced by the usual "My dear, I would not tell you this, but I think you raally ought to know;" but that brought cold comfort to the poor little woman for whom the honeymoon, which had consisted of three weeks of rehearsal and two months of playing, had scarcely ended. They had warned her that Denby could not be held true, but she had shut her eyes and ears resolutely to the bits of gossip and tried to see the audacious glances with which Lottie Lorrimer favored her husband. Now, however, she was brought squarely face to face with her trouble. "I know about Miss Lorrlmer---last night" she whispered. "Just a little supper," he whispered back crossly. "You had a headache and I was lonesome." "There was the club," reminded Edith. "You told me you had gone there." 'I was going, but Miss Lorrimer came along and said she wa mngry, too; so I said, 'Come along, kid, and she came." Edith started a retort, hut at the moment her cue came. Grasping Den- by's hand, they ran out upon the stage laughing with the fictitious laughter that on the stage hides many a broken heart. The audience saw nothing of the tragedy, but wise little Snookums was a witness to the scene. Denby's voice sounded as funny as ever, but it seemed to Snookums that there was a worried look about the mouth in spite of its painted smile. Perhaps because he felt the need of working hard, Denby did better than usual in the kid song. When' he came off the stage at the close of the act he swung the child up to his shoulder. "Still love me, Snookms?" he asked with a laugh that he did not al- together feel. The child shook her curly head gravely. "What's the matter?" he asked, with an affection of surprise. "I don't like mens what don't hold hands with their wives," she explained gravely. "Mamma and papa didn't hold hands and then I didn't have any papa." "That was very sad," commented Denby with pretended gravity. "But it doesn't always happen that you lose papas when they don't hold hands." "Yes, you dol" persisted Snook. urns. "And you was holding hands with other girls. I saw you holding hands with Miss Lorrimer. I don't like Miss Lorrlmer. Denby looked acres8 the stage to where Edith was Just emerging frem her dressing room. Then he glanced down the corridor where Lottie Lorri- mar, unconscious of his glance, was flirting with the stage clearers and using her eyes as effectively upon them ss she had done with him. "Anyone to keep in practice on," muttered Denby in sudden realization of the situation. "I guess you're right, Snookums," he agreed. "I've been pretty much of a fool, but I guess, it isn't too late to mend andwellyou run along. I've got some mending to do." He swung her down from his shoul- der and made his way across the stage to where Edith was standing. "Out of the mouths of babes com. eth wisdom," he quoted softly. "Snookums has been showing me what a miserable fellow I haw been, Edie. Will you kiss and make up, dear?" "Merey l It will spoil my make.up/' she protested; but she lifted her car- mined lips to his and Joyfu!+y ran off to the dressing room to rnake the cupid's bow. Denby went back to his position on the other side of the wings to wait the rising of the curtain. As the girls trooped on to take their positions for the opening of the second act, Lottie paused beside the comedian. "Going out tonight?" she asked. "With my wife," explained Denby; and Snookums, hearing the speech, picked up her tiny skirts and danced with Joy. 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