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Arkansas Catholic
Litlte Rock, Arkansas
August 30, 1974     Arkansas Catholic
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August 30, 1974

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THE GUARDIAN, AUG. 30, 1974 PAGE 5 Searching" for Johnny Who Might Have Gone Too Far By Angela M. Schreiber basics  First of all, selflessness enough to love a child, not checks from home. And I really thought about those summers resent the time he takes. Discipline is part of healthy growth, ahead of me clear through college - hauling bricks, hammering, SIDE THE WIND blew softly through the trees; the sun t brilliance to the golden church dome; the sound of touched the senses. tel[reSide the church John and Emily exchanged forever vows t  bds of gold. Arm in arm they walked down the wedding , into life, down the path of time, destined to make their Faal history together. but it must be both consistent and kind. And then, there is responsibility. We should give our children more and more responsibility, leading them slowly and patiently until, finally, they are able to go forward without us. WHENEVER teaching responsibility comes up, I remember Bruce, a mid-western university student. I knew him through all four years of his undergraduate studies. Most of the boys came coming home tired and dirty. I resented it and came to the conclusion that dad didn't love me. Neither did mom, or she wouldn't have stood for it. "But as the year went on, lots of my friends played more and more and flunked out. Then I began to realize what he was teaching me. He had made me partially responsible for my education; he paid the tuition and board, but I certainly couldn't go to school if I had no clothes and the fun I had was up to me too. ldIL v li,,._- OUNG couples everywhere and in every age, their from upper-middle class families and some from wealthy No, parents couldn't give a son a better gift ! " Jpe Were hi.h and their exvectations of marital bliss great families But I had always thought of Bruce as one of the very ][   [ looked forward to sharing fun, building a house, and in average ones. His wardrobe was adequate but ordinary, and he AS THE EVENING progressed, we noticed that Bruce and his e, having children, spent no more than a reasonable amount of money for parents were often engaged in lively conversation. So, at an naut the road was long and sometimes difficult to travel. It had recreation, opportune moment we told Mr. and Mrs. Thomas that it was so e. ts of shining light and it had moments of deepest black. -th'ghtest moment was the day their son was born. A symbol Imagine my surprise when, upon graduation, I met his refreshing to see what seemed to be an ideal parent-son parents who had arrived by private helicopter. Later that relationship. Mr. Thomas said, "You know, we're very for- , meir love. And time went on. s  evening, they had an elaborate dinner party for their son. tunate. Our family communication is good, but I'm not sure ,nA MOMENTS came when little things went wrong -- John why, are you, Fran?" His wife paused a moment, then smiled , late for dinner - Emily was too tired to clean the house. But BRUCE'S TOAST to his parents went something like this: "To and said, "Bill, I think it's because you and I never stopped gray moments grew and became darker - John stayed at the Morn and Dad who gave me a gift that can't be matched - talking to each other. And we've always talked to them, too." ee late all the time - Emily was busy about finding herself - responsibility. Theirs is a gift, not just for today, but for That evening has given me food for thought over the years. en.Johnny got on her nerves so she stopped listening to his always." Children who have been taught responsibility, have a stable -. This provocative toast interested everyone - especially those home,life and are loved are apt to turn into responsible parents h prattle. Finally it was.pitch black - the day Johnny ran of us in the role of parenthood; so we asked Bruce to tell us about themselves. Io'ugh John and Emily were young, their gait was slow, but it. He said, "When I was a little boy, mom and dad insisted that These usually aren't the Johnnys who might have gone "too all of us, and there are eight, carry out certain chores. I had to far." empty garbage and keep my room clean. Then when I was 15, dad introduced me to work. So every summer I labored on a 1974 NC News Service construction crew. The money I earned was mine to spend however I wished. But I could no longer expect my parents to buy my clothes or give me spending money. "IT DIDN'T seem so rough till I came here as a freshman. But R  TR EA T = | 9 it was hard to take when I saw my friends receive $100 weekiY The Abbey Retreat, Coury House, Subiaco, Arkansas 72865 KNOW YOUR FAITH .Sponsored By Arkansas State Council Knights of Columbus ,.Orld or they probably won't be able to cope. And being a t brings bui-lt--in responsibility. LOT of our conditioning for life and what we expect comes today's dressed-up media and a life preparation for the m material things. This is not good grounding for paren- ag a good parent requires emotional stability, common , and the ability to communicate. Without these things,the requirements are too hard to fulfill. What are these Priest Must Be a Merciful Physician i In Delicate Family Matters By Rev. Paul F. Palmer, S.J. WOMEN men's conscience. Origen has Vitae (Of Human Life), Paul VI i FICIAL contraception control is still an [h,,l.g problem for many ,uc couples who feel to exercise responsible tod by opening their ti new life.   LmnY PUrpose to resolve , m for those who are  l in conscience. Only a  ,%nfessor can effectively  in the context of a i.ent in which the Holy   Present and operative 1, qis grace. I can only '..erlt" on the qualities "4b .... ,: y a good confessor in "qUig the problem. compassionate man of his time, told his people: "Search out diligently the one to whom you ought to confess your sin. First approve the physician to whom you should manifest the cause of your trouble, one who has learned the art of sympathy and compassion. If in short he shall say anything and has proved himself a learned and merciful physician; if he shall give any advice, you will act upon it and follow it." Origen was a learned man, schooled in the Christian way of life which was ' 'foolishness" to been called a "man of the Church," loyal at all times to the teaching of Christ as in- terpreted by the Church. A "LEARNED physician" will not tell his penitent that the teaching Church is wrong in condemning artificial con- traception as an evil, as a disorder. On this point the bishops of the Catholic world agree with Paul VI that con- traception can never be recognized as a good, no matter how good the purpose in practicing it. Like killing, even  the pagan philosophers of his in self defense, the act of closing l,,. day, but the only wisdom that love to life can never be ige  IN THE third century, could set man free, the truth regarded as a good. The end can , the most learned and which alone could truly liberate never justify nor canonize the Il means. IllllmmINlmmllllll[ There is not the same [ffrONG [ agreement on the gravity of the evil or disorder in particular cases. Here, the "learned" physician must apply the "traditional wisdom" of the [th ally ! I Church's best moral at's re effective theologians. I Park Plaza Center | Phone 664-2880 1 Foundations, tt The Tutoring Center l  mm == == == == == == .= .= == .= == ...= ==--= I THE-PRIEST, according to Origen, must be a "merciful physician." The quality of that mercy will never be so strained as to discourage the penitent from returning o the sacraments. On this point there is complete agreement between Paul VI and the bishops of the Catholic world. In his encyclical, Humanae says of those still struggling with the problem: "And if sin should still keep its hold over them, let them not be discouraged, but rather have recourse with humble per- severance to the mercy of God, which is poured forth in the sacrament of Penance." The American Bishops in their pastoral on Human Life in our Day (1968), without denying the "objective evil of artificial contraception," urge "those who have resorted to artificial contraception never to lose heart but to continue to take full advantage of the strength which comes from the Sacrament of Penance and the grace, healing and peace in the Eucharist. May we all be mindful of the invitation of Jesus: 'The man who comes to me I will never turn away' (Jn. 6:37)." THE ITALIAN bishops in their own pastoral response regard the encyclical as the "courageous expression of what is the ideal," but they exhort the faithful not to be disheartened because of possible failure. "The Church, whose task it is to declare goodness in the totality of its perfection, is not unaware that there are laws of growth in goodness, and that at times one passes through stages still imperfect, although with the SEE PHYSICIAN ON PG. 6 October 4 - 6 Womens Retreat October 18 - 20 November I - 3 November 22-24 December 6-8 MIXED Parents Week-end, Subiaco Academy Cursillistas of Memphis, TN Immaculate Conception High School Faculty, Memphis, Tenn. Oblates of St. Benedict SPECIAL GROUPS September 6 - 8 First Presbyterian. Fort Smith November 8- I0 Christian Church Marriage Comm. Lab. Talequah. Okla. PARISH September 13 - 15 September 20 - 22 September 27 - 29 October 8 - 10 October I! - 13 October 25 - 27 Christ the King Parish, Little Rock Parishes of Fort Smith Good Counsel Parish, Little Rock St. Peter's Parish, Mountain Home Parishes of Hot Springs St. Joseph's Parish, Fayetteviile YOUTH Dec. 13-15 - Immaculate Conception High School, Memphis, Tenn. MARRIAGE-ENCOUNTER November 15 - 17 Marriage Encounter, Subiaco No. 4 PRIVATE RETREATS ENCOURAGED Retreats begin Friday evening and continue until about 3:00 p.m. Sunday. Cost of Retreat is not fixed although a minimum of $22.00 {$40.00 for couples) is suggested as an offering for meals, lodging and Retreat. Retreats for Religious and Priests are arranged for the particular group. I ('all or write for reservations to: The Abbey Retreat. Coury Ilouse. Subiaco, Arkansas 72865. Phone: 501-934-2081. Retreat Director: The Rev. Herbert Vogelpohl, O.S.B. i ,